Every Day and Every Night
by Downside-Left
Summary: Zach and Hodgins reflect. Post Pain in the Heart. Product of wondering why Hodgins seems to have forgotten Zach. Possible Zach/Hodgins.


Disclaimer: not mine.

Title: Every Day and Every Night

Summary: Zach and Hodgins reflect. Post Pain in the Heart. Product of wondering _why_ Hodgins seems to have forgotten Zach.

A/N: Not as ZANSTY as other things! And it's Zach/Hodgins if you squint, tilt your head to the left and read it with a British accent. Or if you're looking for it. Whichever. Written for cwgirlup because she reviews everything I write, and because she's a fan of Zach/Hodgins. And she's converting me, because it's REALLY easy and fun to write! Plus, they're both so cute! So expect more (eventually. Finals are coming…. UGH).

A/N2: Just a note, I do not warn for character death, since I feel like it gives everything away. This note being here does not necessarily mean that there is character death, although there might be. It's now a standard author's note for all my stories, particularly the ZANGST ones. They're the ones that are most likely to involve character death (I think at least one actually had it, or at least hinted at it).

...

He doesn't mind being in the Loony Bin, really. It's interesting, in general. He can observe people at their worst, finally gaining some insight into the human psyche. He's developed an ever-increasing respect for psychology. Understanding people and why they do things is one of the most difficult things he's ever done. Which is saying something.

What he _does_ mind is the fact that he is clearly slipping from _their_ thoughts. His friends are forgetting him. Even Hodgins. His best friend doesn't seem to care anymore.

He wonders if Hodgins has forgotten the experiments in the lab, the late nights in the garage apartment watching bad TV and arguing about whether it really _was_ bad TV, or if it was so bad it somehow swung 'round to good again.

He wonders why Hodgins doesn't visit. The constant wondering is making him twitchy and uncomfortable. He hates unanswerable questions, and this one is making him crazy. _Not_ literally.

Every day he makes notes on the behaviors of the other inmates, and on his own habits. But his mind keeps drifting back to his one-time best friend, who doesn't seem to care anymore.

What he doesn't know is that Hodgins _does_ care.

Every day he wakes up, and, still on autopilot, goes to hit the intercom to the garage apartment to see if Zach is up yet. And every day, he hits the button and opens his mouth before he realizes that Zach isn't there anymore, and that he'll never be back.

It makes him nauseous, if he focuses on it. His best friend, stuck forever in the Loony Bin.

His best friend….

In the first few months after the catastrophe, he had done everything he could think of to free Zach from that place. But, for once, money, power and influence couldn't do everything. The _one_ time he actually _wanted_ the corruption in the American social system to work, _people developed morals!_ It still pissed him off if he thought about it.

If he thinks about everything for too long, he knows he'll fall apart. His best friend is in the nuthouse, and there's no way to get him out.

Visiting Zach hurts, so he does it less and less often. He fakes being fine around the lab; eventually starts doing experiments with the interns again (however reluctantly). Daisy might be annoying, and Nigel is kind of weird, and while he genuinely likes Wendell, Wendell is not Zach.

There is only one Zach.

And Zach isn't there anymore.

Zach is gone. For good. And it hurts so much.

Every day, they both go through their routines determinedly _not_ thinking of the other one. During the daytime they can distract themselves, focus on little things to try to forget the gaping hole where the other one once was.

But it's so much more difficult at night.

Every night, Zach plans out a new way to escape from the hospital, a way to get to Hodgins, and how he'll finally confront the other man about _why_ he had stopped visiting.

Every night, Hodgins thinks of different people he can bully (monetarily or otherwise) into helping him free Zach. Help him bring Zach home.

Every day they try not to think.

And every night, they can't stop thinking.

...

A/N: MKAY, so the Zach/Hodgins is definitely implied, if not punching you in the face. It's still a bit ZANGSTY, though. I tried to keep the ZANGST out, but it just keeps slipping in!

A/N2-or-3-or-whatever: So, I'm in something of a quandry (not really, I just like to say quandry). I'm debating whether or not to put up this really dark/creepy/evil/scary thing I wrote (HEAVY ZANGST, heavier than everything except maybe the one where he might've died), or TRYING to write something NOT ZANGSTY. Now, seeing as I write/post on this website, I'm a shameless review-whore, so let me know which one you wanna see next in A REVIEW!!! XD


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